Unpacking…

As I tried to find something in my giant blue bag, it felt so odd…how we pack our lives for a few days…its like you left the majority of it back in the cupboard and packed just enough for 10 days…and how do you decide what to pack?…what do you leave behind…and yet you find a compromise…take few…leave few…
Wish I could have packed my emotions the same way…leave back the ones not appropriate and carry only what I need for a vacation…but they all find a way into my bag and as I take out clothes for the day, they spill out and I’m a mess again…they’re in the folds of my kurtas…peeping out of my jeans pocket…they’ve hidden themselves in the guise of bangles…they mix into my hair as I comb them…they spray on with my perfume…I’m covered in them…I would have happily left them hanging to dry back home…or locked in my drawer…or with my other silver earrings in a little box…they were not on my list…and yet I let them in…

As i unpack….i unravel…and I try not to think of them…so I push them all back in…refuse to let them into the guest cupboard, fearful they’ll reveal themselves…I zip up the blue bag…and drag it a distance and shove it behind the curtain…maybe if it doesn’t stare at me, I’ll pretend that it and its contents don’t exist…