2am…

Its 2 am in the morning…she can’t sleep…sitting in the corner of her bed…a gentle breeze outside but too gentle to reach her…she takes another spoon of chocolate ice cream and feels it make its way down…slow and cold and refreshing…her cure for insomnia…its warm and the mosquitoes are abuzz…evanescence sings in the background ‘you were there but I was alone all along…’
That line held a new meaning now…she closed her eyes and was not sure what to marvel more at – the physicality of humans or their psychology…was it just 15 days ago that she’d found out?...it seemed more like a decade and yet the very next instant it was as raw as ten minutes ago…the ability of the human mind to handle even the most horrifying insight into another mind was incredible…she had actually survived…
Truth had finally had the guts to emerge in front of her doorstep…sneaking up on her…a coward…brought there forcibly…she had stood her ground but broken down…she could not take it…she had broken down at its feet and closed her eyes, hoping it was just an illusion…but no…it still stood there…looming larger than ever…engulfing her…she felt so small and helpless…

She remembered walking down her lane…alone…conscious of the absence of shuffling feet by her side…conscious of no one to share the glorious morning with…conscious of no hand holding hers through the crowd…just conscious of herself as she was…and she realized that’s how it had always been…had she closed her eyes at those times and wondered if it was an illusion, the answer would have been an affirmative…
But a forthnight later…she was amazed at how she was doing…she was her normal self most of the time…okay with being with herself…in fact loving it…music…books…her sketching…she was gonna get out of this and get something out of it…she was walking out with dignity…in her eyes…
She had her flaws and so did he…she’d confronted hers…accepted them…learnt…moved on with a clear conscience…she’ll learn to forgive and maybe even forget…
She smiled cos she knew she’ll love again…with just as much heart…with maybe a little less pain…with maybe someone who’ll feel the same…