only you...

She opened the door to see him…in the shadows…all she saw were his eyes and they spoke more than any words he could muster…they just stood there…and then she stepped back to allow him to step in…tentative to each other’s presence yet very much at ease…his white shirt was so striking in the low lit room…he sat on the blue floor cushions as she settled on the rug in front of him…all it took was her hand to touch his knee to release the anguish and distance between them…he reached for her till he had covered her in his arms and held her so she wouldn’t tremble with her silent sobs…he knew that tremble well…how many times had she flown into his embrace when she was hurting…and how he hated what it did to her…he let his fingers skim over her hair…and then he lifted her face with both his hands…her eyes would tell him…in the light of the lamp, he waited for her to lift her eyelids to him…he keep looking at her, waiting for that big smile he so loved smiling back to…waiting to watch the corners of her eyes wrinkle with laughter…but he wasn’t ready for what he saw when she lifted her eyes…he felt his heart stop…to see her eyes filled with tears made him so mad…this was the girl who he had seen grow up with him…the girl who would open her hair, tuck a flower behind her ear and then dance like crazy…where’d she go?...leaving behind this woman he couldn’t figure out…
She felt herself dissolve in tears…a relief to find a constant when everything around her was changing so fast…at least he was still there and that warmed her up…when she had looked into his eyes, she felt the hurt there too…she saw his concern and it made her whelm up…there was no need to put him through this…his slow eyes always saw more than eyes could see…his arms that made her feel like nothing in the world could touch her…
He touched her damp cheek and tucked her hair behind her ears…wiped the kajol that found its way out of her eyes and taped her nose the way he always had…he felt his eyes trying to fathom what he was thinking…he could not look into them again…gosh it hurt him too much and angered him for not being there…he soothed the lines on her forehead…this one frowns too much, he thought…
She felt his fingers on her face…looking for his ‘mousey’ as he used to call her…the girl who used to sing terribly just for him…the girl who raced him up the college stairs to where they would sit and watch the sun hide behind the hills…she looked at him and wondered why they’d left that behind…remembered the time he’d come asking her for advice on the way women thought and all she could do was hug him and say she had no idea!! She saw him in all his beauty…this boy who had once said he’d never hurt her…who never had…but now his fingers seem to say that they could not protect her from the hurt others caused…
He kissed her nose and felt a smile creep into her face…but he knew that fake smile too well… it was just meant to make him feel better…gosh he knew her too well…

‘why don’t they see you the way I do?’ he half asked himself…
all she could say was ‘cos they’re not you and I’m not me to them….’