Trees...

My love affair with trees is probably as old as I am…from as far back as I can recall, I’ve felt a pull towards them…they’ve taught me something about life and about me…I’ve spent many many hours thinking about them…made many sketches…been laughed at, ridiculed… but it never bothered me…I laugh along…this is what I love and nothing anyone can say can belittle it…
my sketches and paintings of trees have marked different stages in my life…

I distinctly remember my first tree…it was not like the usual two lines and green cloud over it…it was full of branches and flowers…I have no idea where the sketch is but I’m sure my ma can track it down…: )

The first almost life size tree that I painted was on a friend’s wall…a blue tree with little mirrors…all dreamy and unreal…where I fell in love with M and will always cherish that wonderful crazy feeling…I have my first photograph with him in front of that tree…I looked madly in love!...my first love and my first special tree…

The next tree was in ma’s house while it was still under construction…pa got a wall painted so that I could paint it…a delicate madhubani tree filled with birds…supporting life…that’s what home is for me…it remains a symbol of all that pa went through to get that house to become a real…all of ma’s dreams…our nest…

Trees 3 and 4 are in my office…a symbol of how much of my life I bring into my work place…a constant reminder to keep giving…

Tree 5 was painted in ma’s courtyard…I love that space…right in the middle of the house and you can feel its pulse…filled with delicious sunshine and the green of the plants…and right in the middle of it is a little bed…my old bed…covered in a blue and green bedcover…lots of soft squishy cushions…oh, how I long to be there…to lay my head down there…and in the corner is a painting of a Franjipani tree…I don’t know why I chose that tree…but I painted that tree at a time when my life was falling apart and all I held close to heart, seemed like it never existed…it was my symbol of survival…

When I got back to Bombay and started to look for a place of my own…nothing seemed to appeal to me…nothing was clicking…I was looking for something I could not put down in my checklist…for that vibe...and then one evening I went to see this little flat far away…as I walked down the lane, and came to the apartment…I saw a Franjipani outside, in full bloom and I knew at that very instant that I had found my home…I did not need to look in, I had already decided…the tree was the deciding factor…it was saying something to me…I never knew what it was…

And then Tree 6 happened…on a beautiful holi morning…on my living room wall…painted only with lots of fingers…all heart and with all my being…unplanned…wild…unreal…many a times as I lay my sleepy head under it, I smile cos it’s a symbol of all that I am…a symbol of all I am capable of giving…unconditionally…

I met a neighbor this evening…She touched the tree outside with obvious love and said ‘I love this tree…she is my mother’…those words startled me…what??...only I get to make crazy statements like that…the tree had special meaning for me…it was the reason I picked this apartment 3 months ago…and now I hear the tree had a connection to someone else… the Franjipani tree was special to uma auntie…her mother always gave her a flower every time she went to her mother’s house and when her mother passed on, her son bought a cutting from the tree and planted it…so my tree was her mother…wow…she had tears in her eyes and I hugged her and told her my story…we stood there…looking at each other…with something as beautiful as the tree forming a bond between us…
It makes sense now…that’s why I loved the house…that’s why I feel so safe…I have a mom standing at my door, protecting me, shielding me…showering me with flowers every morning and evening…how fortunate am i…
My love affair takes another turn…a deeper connection…

(made that sketch ages ago in a manager's meeting that seemed to drag on slowly painfully...i was sketching the franjipani tree long before i knew how important it would become...)